Nightmares
by Emo Owl
Summary: Sometimes the past comes back to haunt us. It's always good to have someone you love there to help. HanXOC. Oneshot Takes place after Consequences. References Better Luck Tomorrow.


** AN: After Consequences, but it doesn't really matter if you have read Choices or Consequences. **

I woke with a start when an elbow knocked against my rib cage. I grumpily rolled over to smack Han in the head, when another shudder wracked his body. His lips pressed together before twitching like he was trying to whisper a name. I sat up in shock and tried to touch his bicep. His forehead scrunched.

Han was having a nightmare. In all the years I had spent living with him, I rarely noticed him so much as twitch at night after he got over the shock of the accident in Tokyo; I had always been the one screaming at night from nightmares.

"Han." I whispered as I jabbed him harder in the arm. He didn't move. "Han!" I yelled.

"Ben." He screamed as he shot straight up. His sweaty chest heaved as he tried to get his bearings. I reached behind me to turn on the lamp without looking back. When the light lit up the room, I noticed how pale he was.

"It's over." I whispered. "It's gone." I gingerly reached out to wrap my arm around him. To my surprise, he allowed me to pull him back to the pillows.

"Ellie." He muttered unsurely.

"I'm not going anywhere." I reassured. He rested his head on my bony shoulder and relaxed entirely.

"You don't know what happened." He whispered. One of his large hands gripped my opposite shoulder loosely as his thumb ran across my collar bone.

"After all we've been through does it matter?" I asked confidently. Really, I was starting to get nervous; I had never seen him like this. His hand slid down until it was over my heart. I had to contain a sigh as I knew there was no way he could miss my quickening heartbeat.

"I messed up." He muttered.

"You make choices and you don't look back." I reminded quickly. He snorted; he hated to be quoted.

"I killed someone, Elle." He stated blankly.

I couldn't stop the intake of breath. My heart started fluttering like a hummingbird's wings. I knew he didn't talk about his life before he met Dom, but I wasn't expecting that to be why.

"I have too, ya know." I reminded. I cringed as the images of the Yakuza I shot as I ran away from Kamata's building flashed behind my eyelids.

"You were dead if you didn't." He reminded sadly.

"You're not the type of person that wakes up in the morning and decides you're going to off someone for no reason, Han. You didn't set out with that end in mind." I tried again.

"We wanted to scare him. We were going just going to beat him up and leave. He had a gun, and I couldn't pry it out of his hands." He recounted hoarsely. He stopped in the middle.

"We?" I asked breathlessly, hoping he would continue. I was morbidly fascinated with this part of Han's life; I hadn't heard anything about it, and I knew I would never hear anything else.

"My cousin Virgil, his friend Ben, and the ringleader Daric." He spat Daric's name with disgust.

"Ben was the one that killed him?" I asked, remembering the name Han yelled.

"He hit him with a bat so he would drop the gun." I felt his Adam's apple bob as he swallowed thickly. "He wouldn't stop. I kept yelling at him to stop. When he finally listened, we thought he was gone."

"And when he wasn't, it was too late to turn back." I filled in. Han pulled his head up so he could look me in the eye. He looked like he had aged five years and a lost expression filled his face.

"Virgil held him while Daric suffocated him. He couldn't take the guilt and committed suicide." Pain pervaded his voice. Unsure of what else to do, I put my hand on his shoulder in comforting gesture.

"That's not your fault." I whispered.

"I was in the house." The sadness I saw in his eyes years ago in a storage room in Tokyo returned. Now I understood why.

"That doesn't mean you could've saved him. You didn't know." I hoped I didn't say anything to upset him further, but I wasn't sure I succeeded. He dropped his face back to my shoulder. I watched his back move as he struggled to keep his breathing even.

"It's all so fucked up." He murmured. "Daric kept saying 'everyone needed a wakeup call.' That's all I heard tonight."

"You were reliving it?" I asked slowly as I leaned my cheek against his thick, dark hair.

"He went for you as my wakeup call. Wanted to make sure I didn't do anything to put the murder on him." He murmured. I forced a chuckle.

"He chose the wrong girl to fuck with." I answered confidently. "I don't care how manipulative or crafty he is, I was Yakuza; I can handle myself." Han's fingers entangled with mine as I felt his lips brush my collar bone. "Don't worry about me; worry about yourself right now. How can you handle bottling all of this up?"

"I just admitted to you that I murdered someone and you're still here?" He whispered.

"You had one situation spiral out of control; it was a complete disaster, but I know you didn't set out for it to be that way. You're still a good man." I whispered. His arms wrapped around me and tightened to the point where it hurt.

"Thank you." He muttered.

"Make me a deal; I don't bottle things and neither do you." I half ordered/ requested.

"You really want to deal with all of this?" His whispered cautiously.

"If you can take me at my absolute worst, shouldn't I be able to do the same?" I asked sleepily as I found a comfortable spot on the pillow for my head. I wasn't very comfortable considering Han was half on top of me and dead weight.

I thought Han was about to doze off, but instead he grabbed the back of my head and crashed his lips onto mine. When he pulled back he still looked a little lost and sad, but a look of relief was also there.

Satisfied that I wasn't going to go running back to my apartment across town, he settled on the pillow beside me, and pulled me close. I snuggled into his body heat and let drowsiness settle in.

I got a sick thrill from the knowledge that Gisele wouldn't have been trusted with this information, but I banished that thought quickly. This had nothing to do with her, or even me; this was Han's past. Neither of us could change it, but I'd be there if it came back to haunt him.

**AN: Hate the ending, but I have a midterm to study for.**

**Finally found Better Luck Tomorrow in the five dollar bin at FYE. I totally loved it. This oneshot has been in my head for a really long time, I never actually thought I'd write it. **

**I've had so many of Han helping Ellie, I thought I'd turn the tables.**


End file.
